22 July 2018

Gosh, I Watch a Lot of Rubbish Films

Greetings, gentle readers.
Continuing on with my listing and review of recent film releases that generally seemed to elude the popular public consciousness, I noticed that Margot Robbie and Max Irons seem to keep cropping up in the credits.  Aside from the fact that the pair of them have undoubtedly been busy in the past couple of years, both seem eager to establish themselves quickly with a diverse body of work early in their careers.  Having said all that, I've only watched one film in recent memory that managed to feature both of them:

Terminal (2018)

Mike Myers appeared to have spurned live-action acting in favour of voicing cartoon Shrek for the past decade or so.  The former Austin Powers and Wayne's World star appeared to be heading for a career of meaningless cameos ("Inglourious Basterds") and pseudonymous television appearances ("The Gong Show.") Someone managed to convince the Canadian comedian to try his hand at a small-cast, highly-stylized, pop-art-house production with Max Irons, Margot Robbie, Simon Pegg, and Dexter Fletcher.  Unfortunately, none of the aforementioned acting talent emerges from this awful mess with any increased credibility.  A derivative, faux-noir offering in the mould of "Sin City" (2005), "Terminal" restricts itself too greatly in its minimalist scope to present any sensible narrative.  In fact, some of the plot machinations are more insulting to the audience than challenging, and some of the tropes are used and abused ineffectively.  Without revealing too many spoilers, if the identity of a mystery character is a point of tension, but the sparseness of the production restricts the possibilities to only one, it is difficult to treat the premise seriously.  That, and the downright idiotic implausibility of the plot ought to leave an observer shaking his or her head by the time of the end credits.  One half of one jellybean.

Suite Française (2015)

Michelle Williams gets all of the screen time, but Margot Robbie and Kristen Scott-Thomas provide powerful counter-point appearances in a surprisingly engaging Second World War occupation saga.  Usually, these sorts of films spend their time villainizing the awful Germans and celebrating the defiant spirit of the resistance with varying degrees of levity, ranging from "'Allo, Allo" to "The Diary of Anne Frank." This film shifts the dynamic of Second World War conflict from jackboots vs. bicycles to a class warfare scenario typical of a disintegrating capitalist system under the French Third Republic.  Seething hatred between impoverished tenant farmers and aristocratic landlords explodes into violence, confusing the erstwhile brutal occupation forces, who instead of enforcing fascist regulations, suddenly have to mediate a series of petty disputes and generations-old hostilities.  Based on the notebooks of a woman in the middle of these confusing historical events almost eighty years ago, there is a very immediate humanness that resounds through the film.  Williams herself seems almost too frail in comparison to Scott-Thomas' sneering upper-class bitch who cold-heartedly squeezes and manipulates her tenants, and Robbie's contemptuous peasant who is unafraid of using the confused (and horny) German soldiers to exact revenge on her economic oppressors.  This film is a lot of things, but it is not boring, despite the ghastly, slow-paced, period-piece-esque opening.  Those expecting a dry version of "Sophie's Choice" with some slow Chopin nocturnes highlighting fields of wheat or still-life bowls of fruit will be disappointed to see the sex, violence, and character development.  Four and a half jellybeans out of five.

7 Days in Entebbe (2018)

Carrying on in an historical vein, this film portrays some very well-trodden material.  There are probably some very solid political reasons for revisiting the triumphant rescue of an aeroplane worth of hostages by a team of crack Israeli commandos, exterminating a whole bunch of nasty terrorists in the process.  In fact, the fictionalization of the event in Chuck Norris' "Delta Force" (1986) provided many right-wing wet dreams about winning an unending war on terror.  This production even has a whole set of expository text scrolls through the opening and closing scenes that essentially advertise the film as being hard-liner friendly.  It takes some thinking through the film to get past the weird framing device of a performance-art interpretive dance and get to the actual point, which is that the raid should not have worked.  According to a number of contemporaneous witness accounts, the hostages should have been slaughtered in an awful bloodbath because of a clumsy Israeli attack that left Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu's older brother dead, and left behind an elderly Israeli woman to be tortured to death by Idi Amin Dada's butchers.  It is left to the performances of Rosamund Pike and Daniel Brühl to reveal the reason that Entebbe wasn't a ridiculous calamity.  That was enough to keep me interested, though it may not be enough for most.  Two jellybeans.

And that's enough for now.  Whatever is going on with my medications, I have been profoundly exhausted for hours on end, day after day now.  Even an evening's worth of carbo-loading at the profoundly wonderful Café Amore yesterday has not proven effective at giving me any stamina.  At least my MRI is coming up this week, so we can have another examination of my medical situation then.  Before I go, here is my latest random musical playlist.

Random Music


  • Sweet Emotion, performed by the Mighty Mighty Bosstones
  • We've Got the Beat, by the Go-Gos
  • Barbie Girl, by Aqua
  • Glad to be Unhappy, by Billie Holiday
  • No Sleep, by The Cardigans
  • Fresh Feeling, by The Eels
  • Love Explosion, by Lightning Seeds
  • Falling in Love, by Lisa Loeb
  • Teacher, by Jethro Tull
  • Waiting for Magic, by Ace of Base

And that's all for now.  Until next time, goodnight England and the Colonies.
Cheers,
—mARKUS

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