So the swelling from my intubation has gone down enough that I can swallow solid foods without too much discomfort. Apparently I'm also a diabetic now, so I've got stacks of medication to choke down at regular intervals throughout the day as well as a glucometer to accompany my sphygmomanometer in my ever-increasing shelf of clinical medical equipment. The glucometer even links via bluetooth to my mobile phone and tracks all of my charts and graphs for me. It's all very high-tech and funky - the sort of equipment one might expect to see in Oscar Goldman's lab on "The Six-Million Dollar Man."
That being said, I may as well go through the usual motions.
Football
Yeah, let's start with sports. This weekend marks a big international break from league play around the world, so that the finalists for the Russia 2018 World Cup can be confirmed. Belgium, for example, have now mathematically confirmed their attendance at the enormous spectacle, while Hungary will definitely not qualify for the trip. World champions Germany sputtered and lurched to an unconvincing 1-0 victory over the Czech Republic, meaning that despite winning every single qualifying game thus far (some by staggering margins), Deutschland has not mathematically clinched a spot at the big show because of plucky minnows Northern Ireland. Norn Iron has won all three home qualifying matches, keeping a clean sheet in each game, fuelling speculation that the wee nation may qualify for its fourth World Cup Finals. In so doing, the Northern Irish will look to add to their already significant World Cup achievements:Northern Ireland is already the least populous country in history to have:
- qualified for more than one World Cup Finals tournament
- scored a goal in a World Cup
- won a match in a World Cup
- progressed beyond the first round of a World Cup
Germany need just one more win against Norway to lock down their qualification, but their half-speed win over the Czechs also made it easier for Northern Ireland to qualify for the second-place playoffs.
Meanwhile, in CONCACAF, Canada defeated Gold Cup finalists Jamaica 2-0 in a friendly. But that is not the story of the game. The story of the game is what happened to 16-year-old phenom Alphonso Davies, young player of the very same Gold Cup tournament. Brought on as a second-half substitute, he took about six minutes of physical bullying, harrying, shoving, and pushing before being ridden to the ground by a Jamaican defender. As he rolled about trying to get back on his feet, his boot came awfully close to the defender's right ear. One little flash, a twitch, and Davies' studs made contact with the defender's face. Oh, don't worry. The Jamaican will live, and his family have been notified of the 10 nanoseconds it took him to recover from his grievous wound. But the red card came out and Davies was gone for the game and will now be suspended for the next three international matches.
This was a great moment for Canadian football. The young lad will now have time to reflect on his reflexes and his impulse control during a period when Canada is not under pressure to win qualifying matches. His sending off did not affect the outcome of the game in which he was censured, and his absence will give the rest of the team time to gel around newcomer Scott Arfield and goalscorers Junior Hoilett and Anthony Jackson-Hamel.
In any event, I finally took a shower after my external steri-stitches fell off. Here's what the iPod said:
Music
- Lost in the Supermarket, by the Clash
- Our Space, by the Cardigans
- African Herbsman, by Bob Marley and the Wailers
- I Wished on the Moon, by Billie Holiday
- Masculine Eclipse, by Beautiful South
- Brimful of Asha, by Cornershop
Meanwhile, I'm crying tears of exhaustion again. Blood sugar and all that sort of biz. All makes sense now, what with the insulin and all.
Until the next time, good night England and the Colonies,
—mARKUS
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